A Free Educational Resource Created by Carnegie Mellon University to Empower You to Secure Your Part of Cyberspace

The Case of the "Mean Girls"

What started as an exciting online relationship for Natasha led cruelly to her humiliation.

Fourteen year-old Natasha regularly chatted in a chat room where she quickly developed an online romance with Justin, who told her he was a fifteen year-old from a nearby school. After just one week, cell phone numbers were exchanged, so they could use text messaging to talk with each other. During the romance, she would wake up to find a love note left by him on her email and after a long day a "sweet dreams" text at night. They even spoke on the phone a few times. Finally, after three months of getting to know each other, Justin invited Natasha to a party at his school as his date. The big day was near. A new dress and make-up was bought.

On her way to the party, Natasha called Justin to find out where he was, but she was startled to hear a girl's voice on the other end of the line. It was her classmate Nancy who told her that Justin was made up. There was no one called Justin ever, and the entire romance was a prank played by Nancy and five of her friends. “It was all in the name of fun. Sorry, Natasha. Get over it,” she said. Natasha was emotionally devasted. The next week, she missed two days of school, complaining to her mother that she had a headache and could not get out of bed. Her mother did not detect a fever, but she noticed that her daughter went from checking her email and cell phone several times per day to avoiding them altogether.

A month later, just when Natasha was beginning to heal from the humiliating incident, Nancy and her friends posted up messages sent by Natasha all over Facebook. Natasha was shattered again, as she relived the feelings that the love of her life had never existed, and the hours of chatting on the net and the hundreds of text messages had never meant anything, but all of it was posted on the Web for everyone to see. It seemed like the world was laughing at her.

Discussion Questions

  • What do you think "Justin" did to make Natasha trust him? Do you think it would be easy to fool someone in such a way?
  • Can you think of ways Natasha could have cross checked the information about Justin to confirm his identity?
  • What personal information did Natasha reveal about herself online that put her at danger?
  • Natasha and the cyberbullies spent hours and hours chatting and texting. Did the amount of time spent online make the situation worse? How?
  • Should there be limits to a teenager's use of a cell phone and the Internet and what should those limits be?
  • Nancy and her friends said they were having fun, but they were being bullies in reality. What is the difference between a prank that is fun and one that is cruel?
  • What do you think Nancy and her friends gained from treating Natasha this way?
  • If you were among Nancy's friends, what could you have done to prevent Natasha's humiliation?
  • Why would the cyberbullies post the messages by Natasha on Facebook for fun?
  • What damage was done to Natasha and what should she try to do to recover from it?

Summary: Sharing personal information with someone you meet online is never a good idea. It is extremely dangerous to trust someone you have met on the Internet. Protect yourself and your personal information by always using an alias and keeping personal information a secret, such as your address, your school and your phone number. Never agree to meet someone in real life if you have only known them from the Internet. At first these ideas sound simple, but the advice is harder to follow than one would think. Internet predators and some cyberbullies can be very charming, and after a few online conversations you begin to think you can trust them because they might give you compliments, offer friendly advice and say things to make you laugh in ways that are exactly like a real friend. They may meet you online regularly, and you begin to rely on them because you chat with them so often. To protect yourself from Internet predators and cyberbullies alike, remember to only use words and information online that you would use in a public place. The Internet, afterall, is a public, highly visible place, and even emails and instant messages can be viewed and spread by people for whom the information was never intended. In the same sense, do not post or forward personal information about other people. Responsible cyber citizens not only protect their own personal information, but also respect and protect the information of others.

A Real-Life Case of Cyberbullying

References

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